PODSEDNIK’S PINCH-HIT POP NOT ENOUGH
Wow, not even the thunder of Scotty Pods could save them. Shocker.

PLAYOFF PAYOFF TICKET PACKS ARE ON SALE
Playoff tickets. Now THAT”s funny.

PEAVY’S DEBUT MIGHT HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT WEEK
But then he might not be eligible for the playoff roster!

TRIO OF WHITE SOX IN LINE FOR HANK AARON AWARD
Apparently Hammerin’ Hank’s spirit lives on in missed swings at 1-2 breaking balls in the dirt. Scott Merkin writes “Speed is about the only thing missing for this trio, who haven’t stolen a base between them. But you don’t have to run at any more than a trot when circling the bases following a home run.” And this is true. Other times you don’t have to run:

• Grounding into a double play
• Popping out to the catcher with a runner on third
• Did I mention the breaking balls in the dirt?

FIRST YEAR, ONE PRIZE: FOLLOW THE SOX ROOKIES
Except Brent Lillibridge.

TAKE THE SOX WITH YOU WHEREVER YOU GO
Have you ever watched a once-mighty bullpen self-destruct – from the beach? You will. And the team that’ll bring it to you? CWS.

“They haven’t had a good spring,” Cooper said. “They haven’t shown us the things we need to see for us to feel very comfortable right now.”

Now, we’ll pass on the opportunity to pick on the likes of Dewon Day and Gavin Floyd, when they’re down, but the article also reveals a more telling (if not more alarming) piece of news:

Cooper rattled off Mark Buehrle, Javier Vazquez, John Danks, Matt Thornton, Tomo Ohka, Scott Linebrink, Octavio Dotel, Bobby Jenks and a handful of names who have a ticket to Chicago assured. They’ve done well.

You read that right, folks: new acquisition Tomo Ohka is the guarantee of middle relief. Tomo Ohka, who as a reliever hasn’t seen an ERA under 4 since 2004. Tomo Ohka, who injuries have kept under 100 innings as a starter since 2005. Tomo Ohka, whose career performance most closely puts him in line with pitching luminaries Brian Lawrence, Carl Pavano and Kris Benson. And oh, what a season this is already shaping up to be.