The 35th Street Review

Three things to watch for as those dirty Canadians sneak across the border to steal honest American Jobs:

Their better be some fireworks. Of their 80 wins, only eight have come in games where the White Sox didn’t hit a home run. Eight. Meanwhile, Blue Jays pitching has served up 126 homers in 1,275.7 innings. The rain part is taken care of, so let’s instead get to work praying for extra innings.

Bill Wirtz is still dead to me. The night half of Tuesday is Blackhawks Night at Comiskey. Could this mean fans waiting nervously for the resolution of a tense 2-1 victory? An overtime shootout? Nick Swisher punching Jesse Litsch in the face over a dirty cross-check? Captain Paul Konerko arguing icing calls?

Stop by and tell them you love them. In a throwback nod to, uh, something or other, Hawk and DJ will be broadcasting the night game from the Fan Deck in center field. Please resist the urge to use this knowledge for evil.